They had been seeing each other for two months, every Friday, at Snape's cottage, and hadn't fought even once. Every time they met, it was almost as if it were the first time. Having to endure a week of sexual deprivation would drive them crazy. After the troublesome, albeit pleasurable, incident in which they had met themselves, Snape flatly refused to use the Time-Turner to other turns beyond the "statutory" one, and he started to control the alcohol intake during their rendezvous.

That night they had had roast beef, roast potatoes, peas and carrots, all brought by Snape from the Hogwarts kitchens - it's not that he didn't know how to cook; it's that he usually didn't have time to do it. He had opened a Muggle French wine of a good vintage. At first, Harry had found the taste of the wine strange, as he had never drunk Muggle alcoholic beverages, but he soon became accustomed to it. After they had feasted on the custard tart, they went to Snape's bedroom upstairs.

However, when they lay down face to face on the bed, Harry in his pyjamas, Snape in his long nightshirt, there was something new in the way Harry looked at Snape, and the latter couldn't help noticing it.

"What is it?"

"Er... Nothing."

"Potter..."

"Don't call me that!"

"When you irritate me, I cannot help calling you 'Potter'. It must be force of habit."

"But I haven't done anything!"

Snape only fixed him with a piercing look.

Harry winced. "Okay, I know. It's just that... I want to know. What I am to you. And don't tell me I'm your student."

It was Snape's turn to wince. "Technically, besides my student, you are my lover. A very dangerous combination."

"'Technically'. But is it really... only that?"

"Only that?" Snape sighed seeing the disheartened expression in the boy's face. "Harry, you don't want me to declare my undying love for you, do you? If that's the case, you can give up your hopes. I am too old to believe in fairy tales and eternal love."

"But... if it's only sex, what's the difference if it's with me or Pier?"

"Sex is not 'only sex'. I mean, it can be. However, between us, it is not. All right? Are you satisfied? Or do you want to continue to 'discuss our relationship'?"

"Hmph. It's such a girly thing, isn't it? But... er... it's the first time that I... Well, that I feel the way I do."

Snape snorted. "So, you are in love with me. Don't tell me that you have never fallen in love before."

"Oh, I've had one or two crushes. The first one was on Cho."

"The Ravenclaw Seeker?"

"Yep."

"So you are not incurably gay."

Harry shrugged. "Well, my second crush was... Sirius."

Snape's expression turned stormy immediately, and he grabbed Harry by the shoulders with fury. "Black. He... he didn't..."

Harry widened his eyes. Snape was hurting him, digging his nails in the boy's skin. Harry was so terrified that he couldn't reply.

Snape shook him fiercely. "Harry, if you tell me that he touched one hair of your head..."

"Ouch! You're hurting me. Stop it!"

Coming back to his senses, Snape released him abruptly. Aghast, he got up and went out to the balcony.

A cold breeze whipped his nightshirt around him. He buried his face in his hands.

"Severus..."

"Go away," said Snape, his voice hoarse and his hands still over his face, without turning to face Harry, who had approached him from behind.

Harry touched his shoulders gently. Snape pretended he hadn't noticed.

"Don't be upset. What is it?"

The older wizard let his arms fell by his side and turned around heavily. He gazed at Harry with a pained expression. "Go back inside, it's too cold here," he said to the boy. "You are going to catch your death."

Snape spun him around and pushed him delicately from behind.

Harry let himself be led. As they reentered the bedroom, he turned around again and embraced Snape. "He never touched me, Severus. It was only a fantasy of mine."

Snape stroked his shoulders softly, in the same place he had grabbed the boy violently before. "I hurt you, and I didn't have the right, Harry. You... shouldn't be here with me. I am not a good person. I am going to damage you."

Harry hugged him more tightly and leaned his face against Snape's chest, choking on a sob. "Severus, don't talk like that. You... you were only mad because... because it was him, and... I know how you feel about him."

"The problem is not him, it is me."

"You... you only got jealous, and..."

"There are no excuses for my behaviour, do you understand?"

"But you didn't hurt me much... And even if you had really hurt me, I'm a wizard and..."

Snape pushed him away briskly. "You don't understand. It's like an addiction. I cannot help it. I enjoy inflicting pain."

"You didn't seem to enjoy it. Not even when you were doing it."

"It's pointless, you don't understand."

Harry tried to get closer, but Snape turned his back on him. Harry held him by the elbow. "All right, then it was horrible, but now it's over. I forgive you. Try to forgive yourself. Give yourself another chance! I... I won't let you hurt me any more. Okay?"

Snape spun around and grabbed the younger wizard hard in his arms, burying his nose in the boy's unruly hair.

"Forgive me, Harry," he said in a low, cracking voice. "Next time I hurt you, don't think twice: cast an Unforgivable on me."

Then Snape carried him to the bed.

~*~*~

II

That night he made love to me more tenderly than ever. He kissed my eyelids, smoothed my eyebrows, traced my lips with his finger, stroked my face with his knuckles. He made me moan lightly biting my earlobe and licking the shell of my ear.

He buried his nose under my chin, pulling me against him, then bit my neck and my shoulders. He circled my nipples oh, so slowly, and trailed a line of wet, soft kisses down my chest until he found my navel, which he lapped and licked and sucked, making all those wild noises. I marvelled when he caught my hand in his own and sucked my fingers, one by one. Then he knelt at my feet on the bed and did the same to my toes. I felt tears springing to my eyes when I saw him sucking my toes. I was hard as a rock, and he hadn't even touched any of the parts that I used to consider to be erotic.

Afterwards, he rolled me onto my stomach, and massaged my shoulders and my back with some oil - one of his potions. Every time he pressed a sensitive point on my back, I arched against him. He also rubbed the oil on my feet, legs and thighs. Finally, he massaged my buttocks, his firm hands squeezing my cheeks, and his fingers slithering between them, making me hold my breath. He lay on top of me, and I heard his heart beating wildly, as fast as mine. I turned over beneath him, and the shock of our naked bodies meeting face to face was so strong that we both groaned at the same time.

I wrapped my arms and legs around him; he still played with my nipples for a long while, biting, licking, sucking, pinching them mercilessly. Then he prepared me with his skilful fingers, filling me with a lube he said to be special.

He entered me smoothly, and I was so excited that I came almost immediately. He stayed motionless for some time, then he started to make love to me, very slowly. What can I say? He made me melt into a puddle. He made me come twice, and he remained inside me, hard and erect.

Finally I asked him how he could do that. He gave me one of his trademark smirks and told me that it was a very special potion: one that didn't let him come and aroused me at the same time. I told him that I wanted to see him coming too; I begged him to - because feeling him coming inside me... it's better even than coming myself. He humoured me, and cast a spell to cancel the effect of the potion.

Then we came together. I had tears in my eyes, and he, concerned, asked me if he had hurt me. I hugged him fiercely and said that now I knew that he loved me, because otherwise he wouldn't be able to make love to me that way. He didn't say a word, but he hugged me back as if he would never let me go.